OT - my son is having QUITE a day today... | Page 2 | Syracusefan.com

OT - my son is having QUITE a day today...

Orangehomers' post is an example of how addiction and alcoholism is still greatly misunderstood. Modern science has shown us that although in some cases personal choice can promote the onset of addiction or alcoholism, the disease concept is generally regarded as being primarily responsible for how one person can take a drink and dabble with recreational drug use and be OK and not relinquish their ability to choose to put it down, while another begins a painful decent into alcoholism and addiction.

If someone were to relate how a loved one had recovered from cancer or another killer disease, they are generally encouraged and the person suffering from the condition is the recipient of empathy and sympathy. People all to often confuse the behavior with the person. The addict or alcoholic has lost the ability to "not drink and drug". It is a physical compulsion coupled with a mental obsession which is seldom, but mostly never, overcome by the unaided will. Twelve step programs recognize the best treatment for the condition is a complete cessation of using, the acceptance of the addict/ alcoholic that they are such, the development of a believe in a "power greater than oneself", and the precipitation in in a support group comprised of similarly suffering addicts/ alcoholics.

Often, the support group itself serves as the "power greater than oneself". But in most instances, people who recover often are those who have experienced a spiritual awakening of sorts and most often those people choose to call that experience "God".

The effects of Addiction and Alcoholism reach out far beyond the suffering addict/ alcoholic and often the suffering and anguish experienced by the immediate family is as acute as the addict/ alcoholic themselves and the sense of hopelessness and powerlessness can be so intense that people have to distance themselves from the sick person as a matter of personal preservation.

So, the joy experienced by family members when an addict/ alcoholic has found their way back through recovery is a wonderful and rare thing and is an outcome which deserves recognition and support. Just as active addiction and alcoholism creates suffering and hardship on loved ones, recovery fosters a chain of events whereby positive effects are enjoyed by most all those who are closely related to the person who is recovering.

If anyone should think that a person recovering from addiction or alcoholism is not reason for celebration and recognition, all anyone need do is ask any of my 5 children if their lives have been impacted by the fact that by the grace of God, I have not picked up a drink or a drug since August 9th 1990.

Flacusian, as I was reading your eloquent and articulate post, I thought, "There is someone who has been down the road." What a wonderful testimony to the power of intention aided by the support of similarly-intentioned human beings! A higher power can mean almost anything, and the fact that most addicts develop the belief that there is "something" permeating the universe cannot be overlooked. Since many people tend to look at "God" as a judgmental, harsh deity, it is often quite a struggle to to believe in divine love and acceptance, but it's essential to recovery. This spiritual grace does not have to be "Christian" or "Jewish" or "Mormon," although many times that is the way that grace is perceived.

This is a great thread that helps all of us on this board feel uplifted by a wonderful story of redemption and hope. I am so happy for you, Mark! I never thought when I clicked on it that I would be reading this. Especially on game(s) day!
 
Orangehomers' post is an example of how addiction and alcoholism is still greatly misunderstood. Modern science has shown us that although in some cases personal choice can promote the onset of addiction or alcoholism, the disease concept is generally regarded as being primarily responsible for how one person can take a drink and dabble with recreational drug use and be OK and not relinquish their ability to choose to put it down, while another begins a painful decent into alcoholism and addiction.

If someone were to relate how a loved one had recovered from cancer or another killer disease, they are generally encouraged and the person suffering from the condition is the recipient of empathy and sympathy. People all to often confuse the behavior with the person. The addict or alcoholic has lost the ability to "not drink and drug". It is a physical compulsion coupled with a mental obsession which is seldom, but mostly never, overcome by the unaided will. Twelve step programs recognize the best treatment for the condition is a complete cessation of using, the acceptance of the addict/ alcoholic that they are such, the development of a believe in a "power greater than oneself", and the precipitation in in a support group comprised of similarly suffering addicts/ alcoholics.

Often, the support group itself serves as the "power greater than oneself". But in most instances, people who recover often are those who have experienced a spiritual awakening of sorts and most often those people choose to call that experience "God".

The effects of Addiction and Alcoholism reach out far beyond the suffering addict/ alcoholic and often the suffering and anguish experienced by the immediate family is as acute as the addict/ alcoholic themselves and the sense of hopelessness and powerlessness can be so intense that people have to distance themselves from the sick person as a matter of personal preservation.

So, the joy experienced by family members when an addict/ alcoholic has found their way back through recovery is a wonderful and rare thing and is an outcome which deserves recognition and support. Just as active addiction and alcoholism creates suffering and hardship on loved ones, recovery fosters a chain of events whereby positive effects are enjoyed by most all those who are closely related to the person who is recovering.

If anyone should think that a person recovering from addiction or alcoholism is not reason for celebration and recognition, all anyone need do is ask any of my 5 children if their lives have been impacted by the fact that by the grace of God, I have not picked up a drink or a drug since August 9th 1990.

If there were multiple likes possible I would give you the limit.
 
Congrats to the OP, but I need to throw in my 2 cents.

Sadly, I doubt the reception would be the same for someone dealing with and overcoming anxiety/depression. Despite the perception that drug abuse is something brought on by the addict (i.e. nobody forced the needle into him or her), society gives those people a fairer shake than those suffering from (non drug-induced) emotional issues. Drug addicts (and addicts in general) cause so much peripheral damage to society in terms of health costs, broken marriages, torn families, crime, etc... Perhaps its right to celebrate the recovered individual in the abstract, but I wish we placed a significantly higher level of awareness and praise on those whose ailments were less intentional.
 
There's only one reason to ever get married: To have children. I wish someone told me this before my first marriage!
 
this is a nice story. but is has nothing to do with a higher power. the kid was a druggie(sp?) now he can tell everyone how bad it is to be a druggy. are people supposed to jump up and down because this guy found god?

It is God all the way. No one said you have to believe, but you will meet Him when your time comes.
I would rather live my life as though there is a God, then to live like there is no God, and find out I was wrong.

I happen to volunteer at Teen Challenge, and it is only God that gets the results they get. I see it every time I am there.

Please don't give me a nasty reply; I am just putting in my experience and two cents worth.
 
Congrats to your son for such a remarkable turnaround. People are capable of amazing things and adversity can allow us to show what we are made of...though what he went through I cannot imagine. Good luck to him on the proposal! Congrats to you for the large role I assume you played in aiding him.
 
this is a nice story. but is has nothing to do with a higher power. the kid was a druggie(sp?) now he can tell everyone how bad it is to be a druggy. are people supposed to jump up and down because this guy found god?
What a bitter and sad person you are. Would it have been so hard to extend congratulations? That kid has so much more going for him than you do. Sad sad comment on your part. Get yourself some help.
 
this is a nice story. but is has nothing to do with a higher power. the kid was a druggie(sp?) now he can tell everyone how bad it is to be a druggy. are people supposed to jump up and down because this guy found god?
I'm assuming you are just an anti-theist and posted this because you are down on religion, not because you wanted to piss on Mark's wonderful news. Bad timing, bad form . . . that can all be forgotten with an apology.

but I think it's funny that the only thing you seem to have been concerned about was possibly misspelling the word "druggie," not in hurting the feelings of a long suffering parent.
 
I'm assuming you are just an anti-theist and posted this because you are down on religion, not because you wanted to piss on Mark's wonderful news. Bad timing, bad form . . . that can all be forgotten with an apology.

but I think it's funny that the only thing you seem to have been concerned about was possibly misspelling the word "druggie," not in hurting the feelings of a long suffering parent.
it was very bad form on my part. and yes the point of my awful post had to do with mixing religion and addiction. i'm thrilled that mark79's son got it sorted out, I really am, but it would seem that an apology at this point would come across as disingenuous. I actually think people who called me out in this thread were pretty much right.
 
it was very bad form on my part. and yes the point of my awful post had to do with mixing religion and addiction. i'm thrilled that mark79's son got it sorted out, I really am, but it would seem that an apology at this point would come across as disingenuous. I actually think people who called me out in this thread were pretty much right.
can't speak for Mark, of course, but this seems genuine to me
 
it was very bad form on my part. and yes the point of my awful post had to do with mixing religion and addiction. i'm thrilled that mark79's son got it sorted out, I really am, but it would seem that an apology at this point would come across as disingenuous. I actually think people who called me out in this thread were pretty much right.

Glad you posted again with an apology. Everyone has things to firgure out but keep in mind that when someone is speaking of a positive thing in there life be happy for them if you can regardless of your situation and if you can't then at least realize you aren't in a frame of mind to make a comment.

Mark that is a great post. I hope the best for your family!
 
it was very bad form on my part. and yes the point of my awful post had to do with mixing religion and addiction. i'm thrilled that mark79's son got it sorted out, I really am, but it would seem that an apology at this point would come across as disingenuous. I actually think people who called me out in this thread were pretty much right.

I don't think an apology is ever disingenuous if it comes from your heart, and that is all that matters. So thanks for posting this. It takes guts to admit that you were wrong, and there were really no "buts" in your post, so I know you mean it.

One thing I have learned to become is forgiving. Being the father of a former addict, if I held a grudge it would be bigger than any human could handle. I guess that is true for all of us.

So no grudges here. For the record, I am sorry if my post may have caused you pain of some sort too.

Mark
 
Congrats to the OP, but I need to throw in my 2 cents.

Sadly, I doubt the reception would be the same for someone dealing with and overcoming anxiety/depression. Despite the perception that drug abuse is something brought on by the addict (i.e. nobody forced the needle into him or her), society gives those people a fairer shake than those suffering from (non drug-induced) emotional issues. Drug addicts (and addicts in general) cause so much peripheral damage to society in terms of health costs, broken marriages, torn families, crime, etc... Perhaps its right to celebrate the recovered individual in the abstract, but I wish we placed a significantly higher level of awareness and praise on those whose ailments were less intentional.

Your two cents don't belong in this thread. Start a new one to talk about other social issues. A little common respect, eh?
 
Your two cents don't belong in this thread. Start a new one to talk about other social issues. A little common respect, eh?

Sorry, but I disagree. If you are going to post something in an inappropriate place, like a COLLEGE BASKETBALL BOARD, be prepared for semi-related or OT responses. If anything, the ORIGINAL post did not belong. So get off your high horse about what is right and wrong.
 
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Gotta agree with PoppyHart. The post was not offensive in any way and simply expanded the topic to an important area. That happens on almost every thread.
 

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