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[QUOTE="bballbeadle, post: 1293949, member: 548"]
I am the kind of person who likes to distract myself quickly if I start feeling anger, sadness, misery, etc. For the most part, this has been a good strategy for me, but I began to feel that I was perhaps cheating myself from feeling the full spectrum of human emotion. How does one experience these powerful feelings without allowing them to deposit you in the Land of Frothing Rage or the Bog of Sublime Depression for a scary long time?

So, this week I decided to try to release the hounds. It worked! I had a successful angry conversation with my sister, I tried to kill my husband just by using my eyes, and last night after the game my heart ached for the players, the coaches and myself. A deep heartache, accompanied by some mist in the corner of my eyes. Actual tears were not shed, but I was with company, after all.

I can't help but feel that as sad as I am, it can't match the sadness and frustration of our players and coaches. I feel sorry for all of us.

One feeling I have had in great depth is grief. Grief is awful but I have learned (and studies show) that if you walk through the valley of the shadow, and keep walking, you come through to the other side. When you're in the midst of it, you don't believe it's possible.

I believe the sadness I feel right now is more like grief, rather than depression. Games will continue to be lost - and won? Christmas will leave us. The tournaments will happen without us. The snow will melt, the flowers will bloom, and summer vacations will delight. I will look back at this season and think, "Wow! That was really REALLY hard." I will begin to look forward to next season. And once again I will marvel at the truth and comfort of these words:

"This too shall pass."

We each have to find our own way. I am going to let myself mope, and grump, and sigh, and shed some tears. It's possible I will kick a cat (gently). I will watch and attend every game. One day at a time.

War Damn Otto! Here's to you, Dan Johnson!
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