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[QUOTE="Lucid, post: 2549560, member: 6262"]
Somewhere on the SU campus, in a secret underground lab, surrounded by test tubes, Bunson burners, and cryogenic centrifuges, shadowy personnel in stained lab coats are painstakingly finalizing a 30 year plot to clone Coach B, planning to swap the new, younger version in for the outgoing model moments after he attends Buddy's graduation.

New JB's designers have already implanted audio receptors in their creation's ear canals so old JB can feed him wisdom gleaned over 5 decades of playing, coaching, and watching basketball, all as he watches comfortably from his underground "Hoops War Room" bunker, situated conveniently close to a cleverly chosen location in a temperate climate, where golf is played year-round, and old friends (former coaches all) can conveniently visit to swap game memories and amusing basketball anecdotes, and incessantly insult one another.

This bunker will be "unearthed" 1,000 years from now, where the mummified and cobwebbed remains of JB, coach K, Roy Williams, and Tom Izzo will be found facing one another, still comfortably ensconced in four cracked and dusty leather recliners, empty scotch glasses clutched in their bony fingers, and smiles still firmly in place on their weathered faces.

The barest whiff of a 21-year-old Macallan Single-malt will still linger in the air, and the archaeologists will all swear that at the moment the door to the bunker was cracked open they could hear, as if from a great distance, the roar of the Carrier Dome crowd and the raspy but still-clear voice of Bill Raftery...

"Sets the puppies and a little nylon!"
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