Futon. It will have other people on it already. Listen, I appreciate your concern, but as I have said, this has been a topic with me and her for years. She is very anti-sports, which I understand as it DOES take people away from family and really serves no purpose, like video games are kind of like jerking off your eyes and Id, but she has made some concessions over the years. I am just smart enough to pick my battles, and saying "Sorry Honey I have to disappear for a while so I can see if Ennis can follow that 28 point game with another win in an early season tourney, hope you have fun with your brothers I have not seen in 5 years, but I gotta go find a bar" I am 100% sure will lead me to a rapid and at least a month long retaliation, which will include...
- Hourly remindings of what a POS I am for doing that, which will then trigger memories of all the other times I was a POS, and lead to a vicious cycle of...
- A wholesale reduction in nookie and complete loss of hummers
- Sleeping in aforementioned Honda Insight, which has the comfort factor of a wooden rollercoaster on fire
- General uneasiness associated with the "death stare"
- Me having to suffer through some God-Awful stage production with her to feign sincerity in my apology
In conclusion, I will probably keep abreast of the game via scoreboard and then sneak off to lessen the load from dinner i.e. sit on the John with WatchESPN app and the sound down in the second half somwhere after the 2nd TV timeout. I have her conditioned into thinking I have terrible constipation and 40 minutes in the can is typical to conduct business.
Where I typically blow it is when there is some B.S. foul is called, try covering for saying "call fukin Hack" while in the loo. It takes some imagination.
Again, though, thanks for your concern and I appreciate the offer to help, after 17 years, I got it figured out.
)
