If Pitt were a person

[orange79]

they'd be Greg Schiano, ordering his team to dive at opponents' knees while they are in victory formation.

 

[OburgOrange]

they'd be Greg Schiano, ordering his team to dive at opponents' knees while they are in victory formation.

Some habits are hard to change. He’s such an Assclown

 

[tbonezone]

they'd be that hipster man bun guy who tells his party on the way out of the restaurant "oops i forgot my sunglasses " and then returns to the table and finishes everyone's drink , grabs 10 dollars of the tip back, then pockets two rolls and several butter tabs before sauntering back out . cuz nobody likes a saunterer .

 

[JKinPhilly]

If Pitt was a person I definitely would have bullied them in high school. Deservedly so

 

[Qbobby]

They'd be this guy.

 

[OttoinGrotto]

If Pitt were a person and you politely asked them for their preferred pronouns, they'd offer an answer that suggests they do not, in fact, understand English grammar.

 

[SmilinBob]

If Pitt were a person it would be a Narduzzi.

 

[cuse62]

If Pitt were a person they would never get it right. They would show up to your house for thanksgiving and say Happy Easter.

 

[two3zone]

They'd be this guy.

View attachment 246045

 

[OttoinGrotto]

If Pitt were a person they'd count French fries as a vegetable for food pyramid purposes.

*French fries are the only "vegetable" they ever eat.

 

[Chip]

If Pitt were a person they’d always back in to a parking spot.

 

[OburgOrange]

If Pitt were a person they'd count French fries as a vegetable for food pyramid purposes.

*French fries are the only "vegetable" they ever eat.

Last time I talked to a Pitt grad he asked me if I wanted ketchup with my fries

 

[djorange1989]

I think the appropriate thread would be “If Narduzzi was a person”

 

[Franz69]

 

[OttoinGrotto]

Pitt was the inspiration for the Scumbag Steve meme.

 

[C Bomb]

If Pitt were a person they’d always back in to a parking spot.

Wait, do you have an issue with “combat parking”? (What we called it in the army and is still engrained in me 20 years later)

 

[Niastri]

Wait, do you have an issue with “combat parking”? (What we called it in the army and is still engrained in me 20 years later)

It's very annoying when somebody could just pull into the space and let you drive by... But instead you have to wait and watch them 18 point turn into the parking space backwards because in their head they are the only person alive.

 

[OttoinGrotto]

If Pitt were a cover song it would be U2's version of "Fortunate Son."

 

[C Bomb]

It's very annoying when somebody could just pull into the space and let you drive by... But instead you have to wait and watch them 18 point turn into the parking space backwards because in their head they are the only person alive.

I’m obviously biased towards backing into a spot, it just makes more sense. Tbf if Pitt was a person, they’d not pull forward through to the second space in a spot where both spaces were clear

 

[OttoinGrotto]

If Pitt were a person they'd order their steak well done.

 

[Cusefan69]

If Pittsburgh was a person, it would be that guy you see cooking in a diner in the undershirt that' you can tell is two sizes short because it sits just above of his gut overhang and he uses his spatula on a burger, the same spatula you saw him just use seconds before to scratch that spot in his lower back he otherwise couldn't reach.

 

[justgold315]

Pitt would clog your toilet during a dinner party, vehemently deny using the bathroom, and still have TP hanging from the back waistband of his "dressy" sweat pants. Despite the white flag flying from his behind, he used up all the TP, proceeded to "clean up" with your decorative hand towels, and then try to flush the towels. He then B lined to the shrimp, double dipping the cocktail sauce, licking excess sauce off his fingers, after obviously not washing his hands, and throwing the tails with half the shrimp still left back into the uneaten shrimp.

 

[JarHeadJim]

How do you a Pitt grad of your porch?











Pay him for your Pizza!

 

[23Zone]

It would be that resilient turd that would not flush no matter how many times you tried. Just sticks to the porcelain festering. The ultimate fecal ball

 

[baggerbob]

Pitt would clog your toilet during a dinner party, vehemently deny using the bathroom, and still have TP hanging from the back waistband of his "dressy" sweat pants. Despite the white flag flying from his behind, he used up all the TP, proceeded to "clean up" with your decorative hand towels, and then try to flush the towels. He then B lined to the shrimp, double dipping the cocktail sauce, licking excess sauce off his fingers, after obviously not washing his hands, and throwing the tails with half the shrimp still left back into the uneaten shrimp.

Reading through that. Must be the most disgusting post of all time.