I'm kind of surprised nobody has posted yet

[OttoinGrotto]

About how they woke up at 4 in the morning and started snorting lines and six packs of coke and have been running nude fartleks and fighting rabid lemmings since then.

I thought people would be excited about the first game of the season. I guess I was wrong.

 

[jekelish]

I would have, but I was too busy bench pressing a Mack truck and juggling chainsaws in between doing lines off Nancy Cantor's ass.

I also just threw up in my mouth a little.

No, make that a lot.

Oh well, nothing my 17th bottle of Jack Daniels of the day won't fix!

 

[44PRIDE]

Now that's an a$$ you can bounce quarters off of...

 

[texascpa]

I was too busy trying to figure out how to center this text. Oh, there's the button...​

 

[OttoinGrotto]

I would have, but I was too busy bench pressing a Mack truck and juggling chainsaws in between doing lines off Nancy Cantor's ass.

I also just threw up in my mouth a little.

No, make that a lot.

Oh well, nothing my 17th bottle of Jack Daniels of the day won't fix!

Your posts are bringing straight fire today.

 

[DeGrozz]

After I saw this post, I walked into the nearest church and punched the Deacon right in the mouth. Totally worth it.