Not another uniform post...

[OrangeXtreme]

 

[SU in Hershey]

Well, I wonder how long this decision process took to come to fruition.
At long last the NCAA is getting to the issues that have the most profound impact on today’s student athletes.
But, on the other hand, why was this ever even an issue? Afraid to confuse the officials or scorekeepers? Afraid an Ole Miss student would wear their GPA proudly?

(Yeah, not sure why I picked on Ole Miss. First school to come to mind, to be honest)

 

[orange79]

Glad to see they're spending their time on the important stuff.

 

[upperdeck]

and how many databases that store uniform numbers are now gonna be broken?

 

[skurey]

Free 00!

 

[HtownOrange]

and how many databases that store uniform numbers are now gonna be broken?

Do you mean this could be an NCAA version of Y2K? All the data will be lost because the computer will think it is being reset every time a stat for "O" is entered!

 

[HtownOrange]

Glad to see they're spending their time on the important stuff.

Top Ten NCAA issues:

10) Alabama did not play in the Championship game. COMMENTARY: This fell to #10 thanks to LSU, would have been ranked higher if LSU had not won it all)
9) PAC-12 apparently quit playing football. COMMENTARY: Never mind, just watch it for yourself, you will understand.
8) PAC-12 apparently quit playing hoops. COMMENTARY: Where is John Wooden when you need him most...
7) "Student" athletes not required by "institutions of higher learning" to actually attend classes. (Read SEC) COMMENTARY: This was never really an issue, but the NCAA infractions committee believes they must appear to be upholding idealistic academic standards.
6) "Student" athletes enrolled in classes which do not exist. (read UNC) COMMENTARY: This is less of an issue because the "Student" athletes are passing and graduating, per the NCAA investigation. Had the "Student" athletes not passed or failed to graduate, this would have been much worse, the NCAA investigators swear..
5) Sexual assault by student athletes on the student body. COMMENTARY: Obviously this is an issue, the NCAA investigations are interfering with practice, team cohesion and other ripple effects. Oh, and the victims are really hurt by this, too.
4) Sexual assault by administration/staff on student athletes. COMMENTARY: This issue is more important than #5 because the staff and administrators' actions to cover up the matters have failed in their efforts. If only they could have kept a lid on it, fans would not know that school officials can be scum just like everyone else, destroying the myth of academic purity in thought and deed.
3) Performance enhancing drugs. COMMENTARY: Drugs are bad. Just say "no". Unless you really need a 325 lb. OG in a bad way.
2) Punishing schools for minor infractions, especially when self reported. COMMENTARY: Nothing can be more important than punishing a school that has self reported an minor infraction, self imposed a sanction and actually showed some integrity. If you are going to ^%$# cheat, do it right! See #6 and #7!

AND THE #1 ISSUE FACING THE NCAA IS:

1) Whether football players may wear "0" as their jersey number. COMMENTARY: The absolute necessity of resolving this issue was revealed when it was discovered that D1 teams have 85 scholarships, that walk-ons must wear the same number of a teammate on the other side of the ball, that SEC cannot gray-shirt enough players without utilizing "0" as a jersey number. It is highly anticipated that the NCAA will next tackle the issue of whether "00" may be used. It is believed a study regarding the impact could take 8-12 years. Some prognosticators are predicting that the NCAA may go so far as to allow three digits to be used as jersey numbers, but most believe will be a couple decades before a consensus is reached. Many studies will be required. Environmental impact studies must be completed to ensure that no wildlife will be harmed by such an action. Local zoning laws must be addressed, or perhaps Congressional action ensuring that eminent domain of fandom is more important the tradition of limiting jersey numbers to one or two digits.

 

[Nick44]

They’ve been working on this one for years.

The NCAA started its process shortly after they were able to find innocence for Roy Williams and UNC.

 

[upperdeck]

I just know some dumb DBA designed the uniform field to be an integer and its either zero or not and it zero defaults..

 

[OttoinGrotto]

IT WILL BE ANARCHY!!!

 

[Chip]

This is the reason we won’t hear about Bleich’s waiver until about the 10th game of next year.

 

[721Comstock]

Top Ten NCAA issues:

10) Alabama did not play in the Championship game. COMMENTARY: This fell to #10 thanks to LSU, would have been ranked higher if LSU had not won it all)
9) PAC-12 apparently quit playing football. COMMENTARY: Never mind, just watch it for yourself, you will understand.
8) PAC-12 apparently quit playing hoops. COMMENTARY: Where is John Wooden when you need him most...
7) "Student" athletes not required by "institutions of higher learning" to actually attend classes. (Read SEC) COMMENTARY: This was never really an issue, but the NCAA infractions committee believes they must appear to be upholding idealistic academic standards.
6) "Student" athletes enrolled in classes which do not exist. (read UNC) COMMENTARY: This is less of an issue because the "Student" athletes are passing and graduating, per the NCAA investigation. Had the "Student" athletes not passed or failed to graduate, this would have been much worse, the NCAA investigators swear..
5) s e xual assault by student athletes on the student body. COMMENTARY: Obviously this is an issue, the NCAA investigations are interfering with practice, team cohesion and other ripple effects. Oh, and the victims are really hurt by this, too.
4) s e xual assault by administration/staff on student athletes. COMMENTARY: This issue is more important than #5 because the staff and administrators' actions to cover up the matters have failed in their efforts. If only they could have kept a lid on it, fans would not know that school officials can be scum just like everyone else, destroying the myth of academic purity in thought and deed.
3) Performance enhancing drugs. COMMENTARY: Drugs are bad. Just say "no". Unless you really need a 325 lb. OG in a bad way.
2) Punishing schools for minor infractions, especially when self reported. COMMENTARY: Nothing can be more important than punishing a school that has self reported an minor infraction, self imposed a sanction and actually showed some integrity. If you are going to ^%$# cheat, do it right! See #6 and #7!

AND THE #1 ISSUE FACING THE NCAA IS:

1) Whether football players may wear "0" as their jersey number. COMMENTARY: The absolute necessity of resolving this issue was revealed when it was discovered that D1 teams have 85 scholarships, that walk-ons must wear the same number of a teammate on the other side of the ball, that SEC cannot gray-shirt enough players without utilizing "0" as a jersey number. It is highly anticipated that the NCAA will next tackle the issue of whether "00" may be used. It is believed a study regarding the impact could take 8-12 years. Some prognosticators are predicting that the NCAA may go so far as to allow three digits to be used as jersey numbers, but most believe will be a couple decades before a consensus is reached. Many studies will be required. Environmental impact studies must be completed to ensure that no wildlife will be harmed by such an action. Local zoning laws must be addressed, or perhaps Congressional action ensuring that eminent domain of fandom is more important the tradition of limiting jersey numbers to one or two digits.

This is brilliant. Your magnum opus.

Insert Orson Wells Citizen Kane clapping gif here.

 

[Atlcuse44]

N00000000!