#5 my all time favorite.
Dan Wetzel
Steve Spurrier is reportedly retiring. Probably the second greatest coach in SEC history behind Bear Bryant [apologies to Nick Saban]. He completely revolutionized the game.
He was also king of the one liner. Here are some of the best:
1. On a fire at Auburn that destroyed 20 books: “The real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet."
2. Playing at Tennessee: “Will be the 14th time I've coached in Neyland Stadium. I've coached there more than some of their head coaches.”
3. On Tennessee: “You can't spell Citrus without U-T.”
4. On Tennessee QB Peyton Manning: “I know why Peyton came back for his senior year. He wanted to be a three-time star of the Citrus Bowl.”
5. On playing Georgia early in the season. “I sort of always liked playing them that second game because you could always count on them having two or three key players suspended.”
6. On whether Florida would beat Georgia: "Is Ray Goff still coaching there?”
7. When coaching Washington on hoping for consistent success against the Dallas Cowboys: “Hopefully [they can be] our Georgia.”
8. On why he might lose more in the pros than college: "There are no Vanderbilts in the NFL."
9. On Clemson: ""They’ve got a good team, but continue to not play very well when they play us for some reason."
10. After Dabo Swinney said they were from different planets. Swinney from Mars, Spurrier from Pluto. "Dabo probably thinks there's [still] nine planets out there."
11. On recruiting in Alabama: “In 12 years at Florida, I don't think we ever signed a kid from the state of Alabama. Of course, we found out later that the scholarships they were giving out at Alabama were worth a whole lot more than ours.”
12. On Florida State: “You know what FSU stands for, don't you? Free Shoes University.”
13. On Jadeveon Clowney getting a speeding ticket: “I didn't know Jadeveon's car that could go that fast. He doesn't have a pretty car like those FSU guys used to drive."
14. On Vanderbilt becoming a tough game: “They're not slow guys anymore.”