OT: How should I respond to this text?

[Eric15]

Someone just wrong number texted me and 8 other people Merry Christmas, and now the entire group (of people I don't know, looks like they're from Florida) are conversing. What would be the most hilariously awkward thing I could chime in with without going too overboard?

 

[EastCoast2]

Did you take care of that abortion situation?

 

[Halfmooncuse]

Tell them you are watching them as a member of the Gaurdians of Peace and wish them Happy Holidays in Korean.즐거운 휴가

 

[urban96]

On behalf of the NSA, thank you!

 

[orangefog]

How about this: "We have all been brought together for a reason. I received a letter. It said that we would all receive a letter, with specific instructions for each of us. If these instructions are not followed precisely, one of us will die and then another letter will be sent out to the remaining group. It says we should all have them by now and that they disguised as some random junk mail. I hope none of you has just arbitrarily thrown away your junk mail without reading it, their are lives at stake, our own."

 

[CorduroyG]

Merry Xmas everyone. And don't forget to shave your pubes for Santa.

 

[obliterata]

Merry Christmas to everyone who has sent a Merry Christmas text to the wrong number

 

[urban96]

or:

I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you.

 

[Toga]

Go Cuse!

 

[CorduroyG]

Merry Xmas everyone! By the way I just took a shower and my ass is still itchy, what gives?

 

[NineOneSeven]

Just a picture of boeheim tearing his jacket off against duke

 

[Eric15]

If awkwardness is what we're trying to achieve, then I think Corduroy's Santa/pube suggestion is a clear first place right now.

 

[orangetrojan]

or

 

[JJReddawg]

"Merry Christmas everyone! I wish I could see you all, but this anal fissure is just to much to handle right now."

 

[EastCoast2]

If you can get a name in the text, respond with, "Hey (Mike), how long did your chlamydia keep you sidelined?"

 

[NYCSUGrad]

Merry Christmas to everyone who has sent a Merry Christmas text to the wrong number

This. No point in getting mean spirited, it's not like they're purposely trying to with you.

 

[Eric15]

This. No point in getting mean spirited, it's not like they're purposely trying to with you.

I'm not actually going to respond, I was just looking to create a hilarious thread for entertainment to distract me from being frustrated that my wife's getting ready routine is going to make us late for our Xmas Eve festivities.

 

[Full_Rebar]

Ask them if they think Boeheim should play his bench more minutes

 

[Marsh01]

uconn

 

[tptcuse]

"Merry Christmas and don't forget to meet me at 8:00 at our normal spot. You will all be surprised at how quickly the hormone pills are working!"

 

[MCC]

or:

I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you.

This instantly came to mind - it's PERFECT, and I bet the recipients would "get it", hilarity ensues, so on and so forth...

 

[OttoinGrotto]

You could thank them again for forgetting that you celebrate Chanukah.

 

[PoppyHart]

Tell them not to start opening presents until you arrive.

 

[KingOnuaku]

Some painfully unfunny suggestions here. I would play normal and ask more details about whatever they're discussing (I.e., "what's the party address?"). Once they realize no one knows who you are, it would be very disconcerting.

 

[DoctorBombay]

"Why are hemorrhoids called hemorrhoids, & asteroids called asteroids? Shouldn't it be the other way around"?
Hey-ooooooo!