Cuse fan: No, but my coach missed nine games due to the NCAA suspension.
Duke fan: No but my coach missed time due to a bad back (which really means he is a p*ssy and can't take the heat when the team is playing bad)
UNC fan: No, but my coach missed some time due to vertigo (which also means that he is a p*ssy and the team was losing to the worst team in the league and is potentially facing the biggest punishment ever doled out by the NCAA.