Look, the referees will always have an impact on the game. Both teams and the refs accept that before they even step out on the floor. If the refs are too loose, it becomes thug ball and the more physical team beats up on the lesser, or if both are, it becomes a "rock fight." If they're too tight, it becomes a foul shooting contest with no flow. Nobody likes either scenario. So ideally what you get is somewhere down the middle. And since there will always be partisan interpretation and thus disagreement by players, coaches and fans, all the refs can try to be is consistent in what they'll call and what they won't. There are only 70 refs in the NBA, so it's easier to compel consistency there. There are thousands of refs in college and HS, spread out all over a big country, and you're not going to get them all the same. Period. As fans, we have to accept that.
So if you don't want to get beat by a tight call, or a last-second shot, play better sooner. As a player, that's what you have control over.
edit: not a shot at you, xc84.