How to handle the Uber negative fan sitting next to you

[bballbeadle]

I reserve the right to tell all the players that they stink thank u very much

/s

So, how would you feel/react if the person sitting next to you asked you to tone it down? Is there any way that it could be said that would help you think about your effect on others? Your response could be very helpful to me!

Or not.

 

[bballbeadle]

Bring your high school son. Might need him

Hmmmmm. My son is 36 and a child psychiatrist . . . He might be able to be most helpful!

But he lives in Charlotte, so no.

 

[dollarbill44]

A good throat punch works.

I was thinking nut shot.

 

[bballbeadle]

Yeah idk. My take is unless they’re inappropriate all they’re really doing is bothering you and the way you root. You wouldn’t want them to tell you to “sit down” or something like that. I’d say the only thing you can do is move or hope it gets better or they move.
Try something really minor that would make them want to move their seats. Like farting, or not showering.

When I had seasons I always was vocal and had a bad habit of calling players by their full names. Like “yeah Antonio!” (Scoop) or “c’mon Carl!” (CJ). I know it drove my neighbors nuts to a degree.

That would not bother me. I don’t think.

People asked about inappropriate. Stuff like “Chukwu, you SUCK! Get the hell out!” “Boeheim, what the ef are you thinking?” “Frank, you are the goddam WORST! Why do you play?” “You are NO GOOD! You CAN’T PLAY!” Unrelenting torrents. Not a lot of bombs. Now, to be fair, the last game was god awful. I myself have been known to utter a few swear words. But I am not ever hateful to the players, and this comes across as hateful. Why are they paying so much money to come to every game if they hate our players so much?

One of you mentioned asking the kid if he got yelled at the way he’s yelling. I like that idea.

The usher likes me. A lot. I will see how tonight goes and may ask him to keep an ear out. I would prefer to handle it amongst ourselves. I would prefer to be civil. As many of you know who are season ticket holders, some of the fun is getting to know the people around you. I’ve had season tickets for 13 years and this is the first problem I’ve had, so I think I’ve been lucky. The rest of our little cohort is great!

I told my daughter that I had posed this question to the board and she texted me now: I’m just going to tell him to shut his pie hole. Ha!

This has been interesting and fun, and I have laughed out loud at some of these responses and thank those who were giving good advice. Actually, thank you to everyone! I shall report back.

 

[bballbeadle]

Nothing chokes uber negativity more than over the top positivity. Ushers will only bring snippy hostility to the dance, a nice friendly talk won't do the trick, reason will fall flat and a targeted spilled beer won't make the point. Besides, you can't regulate what they say if it's not inappropriate. For every player diss maybe make sure you're louder about every good play. Drown them out with syrup. They may get the point. And, then again, they may not.

Your response is ME. Humor and syrup all the way. Ha ha!

 

[cliftonparksufan]

That would not bother me. I don’t think.

People asked about inappropriate. Stuff like “Chukwu, you SUCK! Get the hell out!” “Boeheim, what the ef are you thinking?” “Frank, you are the goddam WORST! Why do you play?” “You are NO GOOD! You CAN’T PLAY!” Unrelenting torrents. Not a lot of bombs. Now, to be fair, the last game was god awful. I myself have been known to utter a few swear words. But I am not ever hateful to the players, and this comes across as hateful. Why are they paying so much money to come to every game if they hate our players so much?

One of you mentioned asking the kid if he got yelled at the way he’s yelling. I like that idea.

The usher likes me. A lot. I will see how tonight goes and may ask him to keep an ear out. I would prefer to handle it amongst ourselves. I would prefer to be civil. As many of you know who are season ticket holders, some of the fun is getting to know the people around you. I’ve had season tickets for 13 years and this is the first problem I’ve had, so I think I’ve been lucky. The rest of our little cohort is great!

I told my daughter that I had posed this question to the board and she texted me now: I’m just going to tell him to shut his pie hole. Ha!

This has been interesting and fun, and I have laughed out loud at some of these responses and thank those who were giving good advice. Actually, thank you to everyone! I shall report back.

So when Chukwu or Frank make a great play, be very vocal in their direction on how well they are playing.

 

[Toga]

So when Chukwu or Frank make a great play, be very vocal in their direction on how well they are playing.

Come on - like that's gonna happen.

 

[Shawn91111]

Okay, friends. I have a problem. A father/son duo have new season tickets and sit to my right. Kid is 17 and I think played football. This kid (and to a lesser extent his dad) yell negative things about individual players and the team non-stop. My daughter and six people sitting in front of us are all sick of it. I tried kidding the kid about his negativity but that didn’t really work.

I have thought about talking to his dad privately. I have thought about addressing it more seriously with the son. So, my fellow fans, tell me true. How would you handle this problem? Our season may be difficult enough without Hekyl and Jekyl screaming invective at the team. I await your responses with interest.

I wouldn't. They are adults who paid to sit and react, within reason, the way they see fit. The way the team has played I can't blame them for saying negative things about the team.

 

[GooseMutt]

Okay, friends. I have a problem. A father/son duo have new season tickets and sit to my right. Kid is 17 and I think played football. This kid (and to a lesser extent his dad) yell negative things about individual players and the team non-stop. My daughter and six people sitting in front of us are all sick of it. I tried kidding the kid about his negativity but that didn’t really work.

I have thought about talking to his dad privately. I have thought about addressing it more seriously with the son. So, my fellow fans, tell me true. How would you handle this problem? Our season may be difficult enough without Hekyl and Jekyl screaming invective at the team. I await your responses with interest.

How’s the game going? Hope things are ok. Not a lot to complain about so far.

 

[jncuse]

 

[bballbeadle]

I confess to having little energy to give a recap, and doubt it will be read, but that is okay. When we got to our seats, I switched with my daughter, who was not in the mood to sit next to the kid. When they came in, the father sat down next to me and the kid was to the right of him. This changed up the dynamic.

Dad was great; we talked off and on about the game. He was mild mannered. Kid began bad mouthing Chukwu almost immediately. He always calls for Chukwu to GET OUT. At one point, I looked over at him and said, “Why don’t you give Chukwu some positive energy when he does something right?” He asked when that was going to happen and at that moment Chukwu dunked the ball. I said, “What about now?” He laughed but couldn’t do it. The first half was decent and the second half deteriorated. He deteriorated along with it, but the father being between him and me made it difficult for me to carry out any plan. Also, the game began sucking big time. They left with two minutes to go.

I had some sympathy for this kid when during one of the time outs he said to his dad, “I just get so ANGRY because we have some really good players and they’re not playing well. This is not what I expected. Makes me so mad!”

So, it’s going to be a difficult season, it seems, and I will see how things go, but I have a few ideas tucked into the back of my brain and will use them if appropriate. Although I appreciate the viewpoint of some who say fans should be able to say whatever they want during games, my view is that if fans are shouting invective at our team or if they are drunk and spilling beer everywhere, or vomiting, or talking loudly about everything BUT the game at hand, it is obnoxious behavior and decreases the enjoyment of people around them.

But at this point this may be the least of our problems. Thanks to all!

 

[FRANKIEFAN]

The scheduling is killing us.

Apart from Duke and UVA is there a home game this year we aren't expected to win? These are all good teams and we get nothing out of a win and people want JB fired after a loss. I hate our schedule. We played well vs Ohio St the one game we weren't expecting/demanding to win.

Everyone is frustrated when we aren't smoking these teams by double digits because we are Syracuse. Maybe schedule like you made the Sweet 16 and brought everyone back FFS.

NC St is playing top 10 Auburn at home and up 11 with 1:33 left would be nice if we had games like that even if we lose.

Sorry for the rant bballbeadle just making the point that they probably won't act like this vs Duke or UVA assuming we aren't down 20+.

 

[pfister1]

Sorry that your game environment has soured this season. Maybe you can introduce them to stubhub and let them know that they can sell their seats?

I'm not sure that discussing this with the kid is going to change his behavior. I think negativity/positivity tends to be hardwired in people. Confronting the kid may just make the entire game experience uncomfortable for you.

 

[bballbeadle]

The scheduling is killing us.

Apart from Duke and UVA is there a home game this year we aren't expected to win? These are all good teams and we get nothing out of a win and people want JB fired after a loss. I hate our schedule. We played well vs Ohio St the one game we weren't expecting/demanding to win.

Everyone is frustrated when we aren't smoking these teams by double digits because we are Syracuse. Maybe schedule like you made the Sweet 16 and brought everyone back FFS.

NC St is playing top 10 Auburn at home and up 11 with 1:33 left would be nice if we had games like that even if we lose.

Sorry for the rant bballbeadle just making the point that they probably won't act like this vs Duke or UVA assuming we aren't down 20+.

Rant away, my friend, rant away. This is a fan forum.

 

[senorpalmer]

That would not bother me. I don’t think.

People asked about inappropriate. Stuff like “Chukwu, you SUCK! Get the hell out!” “Boeheim, what the ef are you thinking?” “Frank, you are the goddam WORST! Why do you play?” “You are NO GOOD! You CAN’T PLAY!” Unrelenting torrents. Not a lot of bombs. Now, to be fair, the last game was god awful. I myself have been known to utter a few swear words. But I am not ever hateful to the players, and this comes across as hateful. Why are they paying so much money to come to every game if they hate our players so much?

One of you mentioned asking the kid if he got yelled at the way he’s yelling. I like that idea.

The usher likes me. A lot. I will see how tonight goes and may ask him to keep an ear out. I would prefer to handle it amongst ourselves. I would prefer to be civil. As many of you know who are season ticket holders, some of the fun is getting to know the people around you. I’ve had season tickets for 13 years and this is the first problem I’ve had, so I think I’ve been lucky. The rest of our little cohort is great!

I told my daughter that I had posed this question to the board and she texted me now: I’m just going to tell him to shut his pie hole. Ha!

This has been interesting and fun, and I have laughed out loud at some of these responses and thank those who were giving good advice. Actually, thank you to everyone! I shall report back.

Your daughter's strategy might not be a bad one. Years ago I recall being at a Jets game, some drunk dbag kept chanting "Plaxico!" over and over again getting on him (that should tell you how far back we're going). Was annoying the hell out of everyone around him but nobody said anything. Finally, a pregnant woman blurts out "will you S T () (u) you jerk!" to the delight of everyone around him, and he stopped.

 

[LarryC44]

I had season tickets for football 2 seasons ago and had a guy 4 rows behind me who whined the whole game every game he was there. He was actually yelling we should have never let Scott Shafer go and that was before he had any beer so you get the idea. The whole section despised him but there wasn't anything we could do. It actually was part of the reason I didn't renew the tickets

 

[Alsacs]

I had season tickets for football 2 seasons ago and had a guy 4 rows behind me who whined the whole game every game he was there. He was actually yelling we should have never let Scott Shafer go and that was before he had any beer so you get the idea. The whole section despised him but there wasn't anything we could do. It actually was part of the reason I didn't renew the tickets

Were you in Section 115?

 

[Forza Azzurri]

Okay, friends. I have a problem. A father/son duo have new season tickets and sit to my right. Kid is 17 and I think played football. This kid (and to a lesser extent his dad) yell negative things about individual players and the team non-stop. My daughter and six people sitting in front of us are all sick of it. I tried kidding the kid about his negativity but that didn’t really work.

I have thought about talking to his dad privately. I have thought about addressing it more seriously with the son. So, my fellow fans, tell me true. How would you handle this problem? Our season may be difficult enough without Hekyl and Jekyl screaming invective at the team. I await your responses with interest.

Edit...i Decided to delete my original response and go in a different direction...did not do a very good job deleting...sorry...

I would offer Jarhead Jim one of your tix for one of the upcoming games...I can pretty much guarantee a word from him would solve your problem...

 

[FRANKIEFAN]

Rant away, my friend, rant away. This is a fan forum.

We are undefeated on the road!!!

WE HAVE WON EVERY GAME WE HAVE PLAYED OUTSIDE THE STATE OF NEW YORK!!!!!

WHY ARE WE SCHEDULING PESKY MID MAJORS AND NOT PEER P5 PROGRAMS OOC!?!?!?!?!?

 

[Forza Azzurri]

I've seen many posts destroyed by autocorrect, unknown references and bad reply button usage, but your post sir is a king amongst men.

Yes, I really screwed the pooch on that one...almost as bad as my poll analysis post...

As far as my original response, It probably will not surprise you that my real-life persona is very similar to my board persona...i’ve had a few “interactions” with fans - primarily at youth and high school games where that type of behavior is just way out of bounds...

 

[JeremyCuse]

Yes, I really screwed the pooch on that one...almost as bad as my poll analysis post...

As far as my original response, It probably will not surprise you that my real-life persona is very similar to my board persona...i’ve had a few “interactions” with fans - primarily at youth and high school games where that type of behavior is just way out of bounds...

You are 100% correct about bad behavior and when its fellow fans of the same team it's very awkward.

 

[Forza Azzurri]

You are 100% correct about bad behavior and when its fellow fans of the same team it's very awkward.

Yeah. I don’t know how old you are or if you have kids old enough to play but the behavior is outrageous and getting worse.

For years, I let it go. And after 15 years of both coaching, and watching, my kids play a wide variety of sports, I just got so sick and tired of it that I don’t let it go anymore. And I could care less if you are rooting for the other team, or our team.

I could tell you stories that would make your head spin for a month.

My son’s freshman hoops team had a scrimmage last weekend, not a game, a scrimmage.

The best player on the other team and the guy from our team guarding him were giving each other the business all game.

With about 2 mins to go in the game, the father of the kid on the other team stands up and screams, “If he elbows you more time, you have my permission to clock him.”

Fortunately, the opposing coach had the good sense to immediately take the kid out of the game so nothing happened on the court. But you cannot let some one like that get away with that type of behavior.

And, btw, that is one of the tamer stories.

Threats of legal action, actual legal action over playing time, screaming at coaches, refs and players as young as 5 and 6 years old, fights among coaches, fights among parents...I’ve seen it all.

It is disgusting.

 

[CanadianSU]

Can speak from the football point of view it’s pretty fun to get on the negative nellies these days so just wait till our hoops team starts winning again and rub it in their faces !

 

[skurey]

Maybe try reverse psychology and out negative them

 

[Henny & Coke]

Reading this thread is interesting in that it makes you examine your own behavior a bit.

Me personally, I now question how funny my constant berating of my least favorite Buffalo Sabre (Derek Roy) was. I would yell witty retorts like:

“Hit him with your purse, Roy!”
“Sure you’d rather be out clubbing right now but get in the game!”
“How deep is your V-Neck T-shirt tonight, Roy?”
“Can you at least pretend to play physically?”
“Much rather be on Chippewa I see, huh?”

But I digress. And I also think there’s a difference between getting on paid professionals and getting on college student athletes. As such, I would not participate in harassing college players (too much haha).

As far as what can be done in this situation...agree with others who say it’s a tricky situation, as people are generally entitled to express their fandom as they see fit (within reason).

First I might try to get through to him with some humor. Something like:

“Hey, did Chukwu get that restraining order against you yet?” or maybe

“Hope you don’t mind, but in interest of fairness I informed Paschal about the pickup basketball games you play in every Friday night at the Y. He’ll be showing up to “support” you.” or maybe

“You ever feel bad picking on a guy who is playing ball in a foreign country half ways around world from his native Nigeria...hasn’t seen his biological parents since he left years ago...and yet is a nice, personable young man?”

“Too bad it was his eyes that required 3 surgeries last year instead of his ears in hopes Paschal wouldn’t have to listen to your garbage attitude.”

Or if all else fails try this last one:

“I’m sorry, but maybe you weren’t here when the greater Syracuse Community concluded that Paschal Chukwu is above criticism ever since this happened:”


Good luck! Let us know if you use any of our suggestions haha