I was out watching UFC tonight, bummed because of the SU loss and I read a Twitter exchange that seemed to be about Fab Melo. And I thought, "hmm, that's odd. What did Fab do? Why are they talking about Fab?" Then I saw another reference and I'll be honest, I thought the worst. From his checkered history at SU, I feared he was arrested or something. That's what I thought couldve been the worst. Then I heard he died. I was in shock, I was waiting for my friend to show up, so I had no one to talk to. I was in total shock. And when my friend showed up, I almost lost it, talking to him. I tend to be emotional but I was never even a big Fab fan...it just came out of me. It just hit me hard.
I wouldn't have posted that first paragraph at all if not for reading through this thread and some of the controversial things posted. I judged Fab based on what he had done off the court at SU, even in death (though I didn't know he was dead yet). I'm shocked at where this thread has gone. I also had tweeted at the bar when I found out about his passing that I was sad that Fab died. I wanted to enjoy my night without making a lengthy post. But I was beating myself up because I was one of the people who had joined in on the chorus of those who had mocked Fab for living at Chuck's and being a screwup. And of course for the academic issues which hurt our program. And I felt bad that I had joined that chorus because he made a lot of mistakes but we have made our share. I've done things I regret and I've learned from them. Hopefully, Fab did too. But when I heard he died, all I thought about was how tragic his death is. I didn't think of vacated wins or losses of scholarships or broken turn signals. I thought about a family burying a 26 year old kid.
I don't want to join the chorus now condemning cto for her comments. I was shocked by them but I get what she was trying to say. I think she meant that we know Fab made a few huge mistakes, so we shouldn't look at him like some angelic figure. The thing is: no one was doing that. He died way too young. That is all people were trying to say. Warts and all, his fate is tragic for him and his family and friends. That can't be quantified. Certainly not in wins and losses, vacated or not. Joyce is a good person but I think she just let her loyalty to JB overcome her. She did far from walk back her first post with her second one. I shouldn't be trying to talk for her (and I'm sorry if it is coming off that way) but it's nearly 3am and I'm babbling and upset as I type this. All Joyce has to do is to read JB's comments that Fab shouldn't be remembered just for one 10-page paper.
A lot to learn in this thread. I learned a lot, good and bad but I learned a lot. And then this thread went off the rails with someone trying to be funny and failing miserably. In this thread? Really? I'm a very sensitive guy, I tend to be emotional but some things in this thread really pissed me off. That's why I didn't want to wait until tomorrow to post this.
I disliked Fab. I never met the guy but I disliked him. Because I judged him. Oh, well, now I feel sad about those judgements. My friend kept asking me if I was okay tonite. I was thrown off by Fab's death and felt guilty somehow for how judgemental I've been towards him. Maybe it's ridiculous but it was my reaction.
I'm very sad. My first thought now is SU/ the team should do three things: before Louisville Monday: a moment of silence, a Fab highlight reel (not sure which be done first but should be done!) and then we should absolutely wear a "51" patch on our uni's for the rest of the season. Instead of black, maybe we could make it in the colors of the Brazilian flag. Fab would like that I think.
I hope I made some sense. It's now after 3 am and I'm half asleep. I loved reading how his ex-teammates tweeted memories and love for Fab. He was well-liked. Another thing I wouldn't have expected.
Hope Fabricio de Melo is in a better place. Goodnight, guys. My daughter will be up in a few hours, which means I will be too.
