If Pitt was a person... | Page 6 | Syracusefan.com

If Pitt was a person...

If Pitt was a person,
if pitt was a marvel film franchise, it would be the fantastic four
If Pitt was a superhero universe film franchise, it would be the DCEU.
 
If Pitt was a person, they'd be the person that aggressively haggles at a garage sale, only ends up buying one thing anyway, and writes a check for $3.50.
 
if pitt was a person, he'd be the guy cooking meth in a walmart aisle
 
if pitt did karate . . .
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If Pitt were a coach it would be Kevin Stallings.
 
if pitt was a carl's jr thickburger, it would be the "beyond meat" thickburger

* if you've never had beyond meat - it's horrible. mealy texture, vaguely chemical taste.

* OttoinGrotto , i had a thickburger for lunch in your honor, where i saw this terrible idea in the (faux) flesh
 
if pitt was a carl's jr thickburger, it would be the "beyond meat" thickburger

* if you've never had beyond meat - it's horrible. mealy texture, vaguely chemical taste.

* OttoinGrotto , i had a thickburger for lunch in your honor, where i saw this terrible idea in the (faux) flesh
I feel like this post is kinda like a lifetime achievement award for me.
 
Pitt would be the guy who barrels into the crowded subway before letting people exit the train.

Pitt would also be the guy who stands in the doorway of empty trains, then refuses to move to let people on.
 
Pitt would be the middle-aged guy, who despite any proof, claims he would have went pro if he didn't blow out his knee in high school/college.
 
Pitt would be the guy who blows the santa claus secret at family parties in front of all the children.
 
If Pitt was a person, he'd believe that one of those gigantic teddy bears is actually the thing that would make his lady the happiest on Valentine's day.
 

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