If Pitt was a person...

[OrangeDW]

If Pitt was a person he’d be 5’10 but would demand the ball in the low post on every possession in his pickup run, and would NEVER kick it out, and would call fouls almost every time when he inevitably misses or gets packed.

 

[OrangeDW]

Pitt is a middle aged balding man who wears a basketball jersey, with no undershirt, and his best jean shorts to formal events.

Chest hair creeping through the top of the jersey.

 

[OrangeDW]

If Pitt was a person, he’d listen to music on his phone in public. No headphones.

 

[Capt. Tuttle]

If Pitt was a person he’d be 5’10 but would demand the ball in the low post on every possession in his pickup run, and would NEVER kick it out, and would call fouls almost every time when he inevitably misses or gets packed.

And he hacks you every time reaching in for a steal, calls a foul on every shot, and calls you for a charge.

 

[Eric15]

The Best Man in Pitts wedding was Mike Lindell.

 

[OrangeDW]

And he hacks you every time reaching in for a steal, calls a foul on every shot, and calls you for a charge.

If Pitt catches the ball on the perimeter he refuses to make the obvious simple pass and instead holds the ball until someone cuts to the basket (after he screams “CUT TO THE BASKET”) and then tries to rifle one through 5 defenders that would get his cutting teammate swarmed even if they miraculously caught it.

 

[HOFCeluck]

If Kenny Pickett errrrr Pitt was a person he’d look exactly like this.

 

[BigNastyJon]

I might be the Pitt of this board.

If pitt was a person, he would wipe his butt and get poop on his finger...and then sniff it because hes curious what sheet smells like.

Make that two Pitts on the board

 

[OrangeDW]

The Best Man in Pitts wedding was Mike Lindell.

Pitt regularly says “I’m not trying to be a conspiracy theorist BUT” and then proceeds to grunt out the most recent conspiracy theory he saw a deleted YouTube video on, to anyone who will pretend to listen.

 

[AZOrange]

Jeffrey Dahmer

 

[Eric15]

Jeffrey Dahmer

That is completely insulting and inappropriate... to Jeffrey Dahmer.

 

[Eric15]

Pitt bought all it's clothes and home decor at Spencer Gifts.

 

[orange79]

If Pitt was a person...well, let's just say

 

[OrangeDW]

If Pitt was a person...well, let's just say

View attachment 223377

Holy…I think this thread was around before Runner, and was resurrected after he was gone.

We could just post all of his classics in here and call it a day!

 

[OrangeDW]

If Pitt was a person, in 2021 he cut the COVID vaccine line.

 

[OrangeDW]

If Pitt was a person in the 2021-22 season he would’ve claimed he was standing his ground and had the right to enter the Done without a mask because his father in law was a veteran.

 

[OrangeDW]

If Pitt was a person, he’d go through a 12er of Miller Hi Life on his deck every day.

 

[Eric15]

If Pitt was a person, in 2021 he cut the COVID vaccine line.

There's no way Pitt was getting vaccinated.

 

[OrangeDW]

If Pitt was a person, he’d give you a hard time for wearing clean sneakers while wearing some disgusting trashed 5 year old Payless pickups. “You gotta those things dirty! Ahahaha!”

 

[RF2044]

If Pitt was a person, he'd have chronic halitosis.

 

[HOFCeluck]

If Pitt was a person he’d brag about going three years without getting Covid because he exercised, took vitamins, and never got the vaccine. Also he argues with anyone on Twitter who makes fun of Joe Rogan.

 

[HtownOrange]

If Pitt was a person, he would offer to pay cash for your house.

If Pitt was a person, when masking for COVID the mask would be under his chin.

If Pitt were a person, he would re-gift last year's fruitcake to the person who gave it to him.

If Pitt were a person, its pronouns would be "dumb" and "(reader's choice)".

 

[Capt. Tuttle]

If Pitt was a person, he would offer to pay cash for your house.

If Pitt was a person, when masking for COVID the mask would be under his chin.

If Pitt were a person, he would re-gift last year's fruitcake to the person who gave it to him.

If Pitt were a person, its pronouns would be "dumb" and "(reader's choice)".

But, would he re-gift a label maker.

 

[JDubbin]

If Pitt was a person, he...

 

[OrangeDW]

If Pitt was a person he would make fun of all woman athletes and claim he could easily beat them at their sport, even though he’s now 30 pounds overweight and 20 years ago only got in on special teams here and there in Class C football.